Waiting to go inside the ceremony, with the groom-to-be and a cousin of his.
This weekend we were privileged to be part of a Ugandan version of an engagement party called an Introduction. Ivan’s cousin was the groom-to-be, so we formed part of the grooms parade!
Allen (Ivan’s wife) dressing us before we set off. There is a specific knot for the bow to make it flat at the front and make sure it isn’t too long.
Rachel and I with Allen and Aunty (thats what everyone calls her, we aren’t told her name!), oh and cutie Elisha
Allen, Ivan and two of their youngest, Elisha and Mary-Anne
We set off at 9am, after being dressed by Allen and Aunty in traditional costume. We picked up Ivan’s sister, Jane on the way, who would also act as our interpreter during the event. We were told the trip would be 2 hours, which became clear was African time when we arrived at 3pm! We travelled in convoy with the rest of the groom-to-be’s party so there is no such thing as arriving late. Driving in Uganda is a blog post in itself!
Chris checking out a coffee tree while we waited to go into the Introduction.
On arrival we reorganised our dresses and got ready to file into the bride-to-be’s parents home. Traditionally, the groom and his party travel to the brides family home to seek acceptance from them for a future wedding. They carry gifts to offer, including a goat, a few chickens, pictures and many baskets filled with a myriad of food and household items. These events have large numbers of guests, this one was about 150, but they are apparently small in comparison to the weddings which have on average 400! Good thing this is a community oriented society, everyone contributes resources to the families.
Lining up to go inside. Don’t you love Ugandan hairstyles?
We walked in two rows of men and women into the tented area where we could hear an announcer welcoming us (including the Muzungus – white people!). We were hidden from view of the brides party at that point. Some of the brides friends and family came through the curtain and washed our hands and gave us plates of food to eat. Good thing they washed our hands as we encountered our first experience eating with our fingers! Note here, only the right hand seems to be used when eating(we learn by watching!) Hands washed again, and we walked back outside.
Chris and Ivan sitting in the front row at the Introduction before the curtains were removed. The man in the corner is our spokesperson.
Having our hands washed for the meal.
Our meal, prepared by the bride-to-be’s family. The banana leaves contained chicken or beef cooked in a broth. No cutlery here!
This time we were given yellow bows for our outfits before being allowed back inside for the next stage of the ceremony.
This time a speaker for the grooms party negotiated for us to be accepted by the brides party. The brides party spokesperson gave him a hard time of it all, bantering back and forth about why we should be accepted when they don’t know us. What ensued after that is what I presume gives it the title ‘introduction’ as we had parades of friends and kids, and Aunts – the aunts have the final work whether the groom is accepted! In the Ugandan culture, sisters are given a lot of respect, so we knelt to them when they came through.
The curtain is removed to reveal the brides family and friends. The groom is in front of us, with his sister acting as the female head of the family on his left, and his father on the right.
Finally, after about an hour and a half, we were accepted! But only once the gifts are brought through for the brides family. So back we go outside to bring them in, women carrying the baskets on their heads as only African women can!
The presents from the grooms family. You can just make out the ear from the goat in the front of the truck. Maybe once I’ve been here a while I will be able to balance the basket with no hands!
Unfortunately it was getting late by then, and Ivan was preaching early the next morning so we took the opportunity to discreetly leave the party and start the long drive home!
Two Gibsons in Africa 